Enroute!

"Enroute" is just a label!

Why does someone else telling me my 'status' cause my heart to flip and my hands to shake?

working on our packing list...
with our coffee of course :)

After all, I've known for some time now that we are heading to PNG. But for some reason, having our status changed from "In transition" (as we finished our training) to "Enroute" was an overwhelming slice of reality today.

The activities of our days are very much geared toward our departure now. Yesterday I found some stainless steel mixing bowls at a thrift store that will be a part of my kitchen in the tribe (goodbye Pyrex!). And today we spent several hours working on our packing list. And making further plans for the Christmas 'fundraiser' dinner we are doing next month.

I almost feel like I'm kicking myself out of my life! Haha! :) (Confused laugh...)

It is absolutely mind-boggling to try and wrap my brain around this. How does one move overseas? How does one pack for that? How does one prepare for that? Someone explain this to me please!

There are elements that make my heart sad. But there are elements that cause my heart great excitement!

The question that rings in my heart and mind OVER and OVER and OVER again each day is one that was asked by someone a few months ago:

"How do you stay focused on the task at hand when there is pain inside?!"

I'm not putting my answer out there at this time. But I will say that with each heartache I encounter, I find unexplainable and inexpressible joy that swallows it up. No, I am not saying that Jesus brushes off our pain. Far from it! But what I am saying is that in the midst of our pain, He Himself is our Joy... even when that means that He is the shoulder on which our tears fall on. I am also saying that walking in Him is more than worth it- for He brings joy to living and breathing... I have no other purpose! And lastly, I am additionally saying that being involved in this incredible mission of His- to bring souls from darkness into His Light? What tremendous JOY!! Lord, please let me be a part!! 

I feel as Paul did in 1 Timothy 1.12: "I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that He considered me faithful, appointing me to His service." He goes on to talk about the wonder of Christ using Him in spite of the sinner that He was/is. I couldn't agree more... it is continually amazing to me that He would consider using me, for I am such a selfish, self-pleasing, self-indulging, prideful individual. 

But He uses cracked, broken, weak vessels to display HIS glory, not our own. So may He use me, and use me to the fullest! ... oh and He also promises to complete the work He has begun in us until the day of Christ Jesus. So I hope that as I continue walking in Him that He will continue conforming me to the image of Christ. I would selfishly enjoy being less selfish. (See? What a problem.... hehe)