"...for he was looking forward to the city with foundations,
whose architect and builder is God."
"All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance, admitting that they were foreigners and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country- a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them."
"...They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and holes in the ground. These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised, since God had something better planned for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect."
~excerpts from Hebrews 11
There are some things about this type of lifestyle (overseas missionary work) that are rather difficult. This is me sharing about one of them.
I still remember the day back in summer 2009 when our U-Haul rental trailer showed up. We were committed, so it wasn't by any means a moment of fear to pack up what belongings we hadn't sold and move across the country. But it was very surreal. Surreal to uproot our entire lives, not knowing exactly where we were going, and proceed to walk this road by faith. It's counter-cultural to much of this world to not have roots planted in the soil. To not have a foundation. (Yes, even though the houses in the tribe don't generally have concrete foundations, they do have their own form of foundations- posts that are planted deep into the earth.) It is, to say it simply, unsettling to not be settled. I'm not too terribly 'girly' in general... in fact, my husband is much more of a "Martha Stewart" than I am... I remember finding some small shelves at a thrift store once and asking him if they would work for one of our rooms, but alas, "they didn't match." Haha! But in all seriousness, as a woman I do find that the deepest part of me has a longing to be settled, to have roots planted, to have a foundation to stand on. This lifesetyle has essentially made us sojourners/travelers. Consequently, no matter what home we go to (and we have lived in so many over the last decade!), it never quite feels like "mine". In fact, the longer we live this journey, the less ANYthing feels like "mine", be it a house, or a country, or a local church, or even a friend. I don't feel like any of those things belong to me, and I don't anymore feel like I quite belong to any of them.
There are definitely times when my heart feels sad about this. The constant 'goodbyes' are a constant reminder to my heart of its reality. This lifestyle gives us the best reunions with family and friends, but they always feel much too short-lived. The people we leave behind can't feel my heart pounding as we drive away. They don't see the tear slip down my cheek as their home and their town fades off into the hills. They don't sense the tugging at my heart as our plane pushes back from the gate. They don't feel the ache as I accept that a few more years will now go by before I get to hear their hearts again or worship the Lord together in person with them. They don't grasp that I feel like a visitor at churches we have spent years with, because there are so many new faces. They don't understand that we scratch our heads that a fast food burger that used to be $1 is now $4. They don't see how we could feel foreign in our passport culture.
Then there are other times when I am feeling quite the opposite about it all, for indeed as time goes by I feel an ever-deepening closeness to those of whom the Scripture passages above speak of! These are my brothers and sisters who have gone before me, leaving all that they knew behind them for the greatest purpose there ever was! How could I do anything but rejoice along with them, even through the suffering! These are the people who feel ever more like my true friends, largely in part because I now share in their longing for that 'heavenly country'. The sense of longing for home here on earth, although quite real and heart-breaking at times, essentially becomes completely eclipsed by the longing for 'a heavenly country', for 'a better country'! There simply is no place on this earth that will ever fully feel like "mine". For the "home" that I long for is really a person. It's the Person that I long for- it's Jesus Himself! On the day when we are finally with Him face to face for all of eternity, then I will at last feel like I have a foundation to stand on, a place to plant roots, a place to call Home.
~excerpts from Hebrews 11
There are some things about this type of lifestyle (overseas missionary work) that are rather difficult. This is me sharing about one of them.
I still remember the day back in summer 2009 when our U-Haul rental trailer showed up. We were committed, so it wasn't by any means a moment of fear to pack up what belongings we hadn't sold and move across the country. But it was very surreal. Surreal to uproot our entire lives, not knowing exactly where we were going, and proceed to walk this road by faith. It's counter-cultural to much of this world to not have roots planted in the soil. To not have a foundation. (Yes, even though the houses in the tribe don't generally have concrete foundations, they do have their own form of foundations- posts that are planted deep into the earth.) It is, to say it simply, unsettling to not be settled. I'm not too terribly 'girly' in general... in fact, my husband is much more of a "Martha Stewart" than I am... I remember finding some small shelves at a thrift store once and asking him if they would work for one of our rooms, but alas, "they didn't match." Haha! But in all seriousness, as a woman I do find that the deepest part of me has a longing to be settled, to have roots planted, to have a foundation to stand on. This lifesetyle has essentially made us sojourners/travelers. Consequently, no matter what home we go to (and we have lived in so many over the last decade!), it never quite feels like "mine". In fact, the longer we live this journey, the less ANYthing feels like "mine", be it a house, or a country, or a local church, or even a friend. I don't feel like any of those things belong to me, and I don't anymore feel like I quite belong to any of them.
There are definitely times when my heart feels sad about this. The constant 'goodbyes' are a constant reminder to my heart of its reality. This lifestyle gives us the best reunions with family and friends, but they always feel much too short-lived. The people we leave behind can't feel my heart pounding as we drive away. They don't see the tear slip down my cheek as their home and their town fades off into the hills. They don't sense the tugging at my heart as our plane pushes back from the gate. They don't feel the ache as I accept that a few more years will now go by before I get to hear their hearts again or worship the Lord together in person with them. They don't grasp that I feel like a visitor at churches we have spent years with, because there are so many new faces. They don't understand that we scratch our heads that a fast food burger that used to be $1 is now $4. They don't see how we could feel foreign in our passport culture.
Then there are other times when I am feeling quite the opposite about it all, for indeed as time goes by I feel an ever-deepening closeness to those of whom the Scripture passages above speak of! These are my brothers and sisters who have gone before me, leaving all that they knew behind them for the greatest purpose there ever was! How could I do anything but rejoice along with them, even through the suffering! These are the people who feel ever more like my true friends, largely in part because I now share in their longing for that 'heavenly country'. The sense of longing for home here on earth, although quite real and heart-breaking at times, essentially becomes completely eclipsed by the longing for 'a heavenly country', for 'a better country'! There simply is no place on this earth that will ever fully feel like "mine". For the "home" that I long for is really a person. It's the Person that I long for- it's Jesus Himself! On the day when we are finally with Him face to face for all of eternity, then I will at last feel like I have a foundation to stand on, a place to plant roots, a place to call Home.
